Yesterday, I once again posited this question to myself.

I have not really thought the matter through, but it seems to me to be an area which could produce much which is worth knowing.

The question is this:

If my love to you is conditional, is it love at all?

We have looked at two fundamental views of love.

The one says that it is a feeling which should be acted on.

The other says that it is a life philosophy of giving unto others as continuously as possible, in what we call self-sacrifice.

(I think that it is the underlying factual basis of self-worth and self esteem, etc.)

Either we are in a stranger time than it has been so far in my life, or I am just becoming more sensitized to exactly what it is that is going on all around me.

It is the culmination of multiple generations of narciscissm having run amok.

I am "the greatest generation which ever lived", while you are "Generation X".

I am a winner.  You are a loser.

That is the message, both spoken and unspoken.

But what kind of a weird person goes into competition against their own children?

Especially when the child is altogether without defense.

Narcicissts! that's who.

And they are a dime a dozen.

They are everywhere, every which way you look.

When younger I spent years trying to get away from these people.

I went into remote wilderness to escape their madness.

But, I soon found out that there simply is no escaping on this little planet.

They are everywhere!

I have now been over most of the northern hemislphere and much of the southern hemisphere, and have just found more and more and more, everywhere I go and every which way I look.

So, what is this thing of which you may sense the fear coming off of me as I write about it?


The encouragement, yea, demanding, that the child never differentiate itself too much.

The child lives to please the parent.

The child lives to SERVE the parent, in the most slavish way possible as they are emotionally bound up until the very life is sucked out of them as they become a shell of a human.

All outside, no inside.

As each generation progresses down this horrific path most of the members of that generation become a little bit stranger.

This is where I get to use a word which I very rarely get to use, and I am so excited that I am squirming all over the place as I write this.


They are vacuous

Their existence is vacuous.

They invented "the Lost Generation".

They invented nihilism as a real and living philosophy.

They murdered more human beings in one hundred years than everyone before them added together in all of recorded history.

And they now are spreading nuclear contamination all over the planet until one can only wonder how any higher life forms stand a chance when these would-be warriors have their next little sand box fight.

There is depleted uranium spread all throughout the land, on top of the soil, in Iraq.

Do you suppose any of that got airborne?

They used up the entire supply of uranium in that little political adventure.

Then they rushed like crazy all over the planet to secure all known sources and have restocked and are ready to have at it again.

You would think that they had taken on some huge and mighty army, such that you would be required to use depeleted uranium on all of your tank projectiles and many of your missiles.

But we all know now that Sadam Hussein didn't have an army even worth talking about; no more effective than your local police department when it comes to fighting ability.

The shell can be seen by the bright flash which they emit.

That very flash is throwing material up into the air as ejecta.

It is very small and very light material (as in gaseous) immediately following the explosion.

It most definitely goes up into the air as well as all over the ground.

This has become standard modus operandi.

We found out after Fukushima on March 11, 2011, that every single rod pool in the world is filled to capacity.

Many rods are laying on the ground around the pools.

This problem is only accelerating and getting worse.

This could literally spell the end of most life on earth as this progresses to it's fruition.

You would think everyone would be screaming to do something about this before all of our babies are grossly deformed and we are covered with skin lesions and cursing the day we were born.


Only in ME ME ME land could this be possible.

Just how short sighted and stupid would one have to be?

And that on a grand scale?

Somebody surely must be asking how this could even be possible.

Well, folks, this is NIHILISM born of NARCICISSM.

Now, I said all of that to say this:

imagine what kind of children such persons would likely have when taught the same lack of values system as the parents have subscribed to unto the utter destruction of themselves and everything which they hold dear, while they don't back off even one inch;  high speed ahead;  damn the torpedoes, was the last thing I remember hearing.

I know that was a lot of background, but it is needed in order to better comprehend what I am about to say.

To the narcicisst the child is an extension of self.

The only problem is that with narcicissm there is no self.

That is the very nature of the condition.

The real self has been crushed into near non-existence while an artificial self has been ever so carefully created to replace the true self and to pretend to be that which it most certainly is not.

I noticed when I was very young that people tend to wear the opposite face of what they are.

When sad, they don't want everyone in the grocery market knowing that.

If they are really happy they may decide that they had best tone it down a little, so as not to attract too much attention.

Most people don't have a very good sense of balance when it comes to these things.

So, they tend to overcompensate.

So, if I am feeling really terrible about myself, I will not just put on a smile, but I will be the happiest person you have ever seen.

All giddy and jumping all over the place while laughing and giggling and carrying on.

It is this mostly unrecognized tendency which gives away the whole game to an astute observer.

It is kind of like when politicians say that they are for a strong dollar while having spent the last 50 years trashing the currency for all they are worth.

Yes, and I am for everyone having everything they desire with no effort whatsoever required.

But, so what.

Saying that the law of gravity does not exist any longer by fiat will not keep me from falling down and breaking bones when I trip or stumble.

So, what is going to happen when a vacuous person has a sexual relationship, then some kind of quasi-marital relationship, and then has children?

Did you see it coming?

Aw, c'mon.

I just know you can see it.


For, how else could it be?

If the parent has nothing to give, then where exactly is a child of tender years going to get it from during those critical formative years?

Oh, oh, this looks like some really nasty and evil roots which are sprouting here before the child has even had an opportunity to walk or to say his or her first words.

much more to come?

it's been fun, as usual.

Hope all is well with all of my loved ones.

Love you all, in the most sacrificial sense possible.


Thursday morning

8:50 a.m.

Ventura, California, USA