It is five minutes to 8 a.m. 

I have been listening to the latest compositions
(really loud
on really good 
near field reference monitors)
for past 30 minutes.
Every single inch of space in this room is literally vibrating.

I love to walk from one end to the other and to feel all of the different vibrations which are flying every which way.

You can actually reach out and feel the music as it travels through the room, with different frequencies and frequency ranges being prominent at different points as you walk.

Three huge speakers down each side of the room is good.

But is it enough?

(how about another subwoofer or two? or four?)

Hmmmmmm ----

I don't know what it does to
or for
your body.

But, I do know that it feels really good.

On another subject,

I have a sign on my wall right next to me,
and one in my RV,
right as you enter,
which say:

The Best Things in Life are not Things.

I got a good solid reminder of this
when my son paid me a visit last night
and showed me the photo album
which his mom had made
and given to him.

There it is,
your entire (emotional) life,
artfully spread out
on a few pages of a scrapbook.

What a weird (and wonderful) sight that is.

Having fallen off of a cliff recently
and being only partially recovered
from serious injuries
to various body parts,
puts this all in a perspective
which would simply otherwise be impossible
to comprehend
or even to imagine.

I must confess
that this is hardly
the first "near-death" experience for me.

I have had enough during my life
to make me almost casual about it.

Some would say, overly so.

This is only one
in a series of reminders
of my utter and futile mortality.

"No, you are not God".


I begin to ponder the ramifications of this
as I am not sure
whether to consider crashing into the ground from above
a form of flight
or not.

If so, I flew.

If not, -----

Well, do we really need to go there?

I think not.

It is true
and certain
that things can
and will
become clear
at some indeterminate time
in "the now"
in the future.

There is nothing
any human
or human agency
can do to stop that.

Truth WILL prevail.

Fact over fiction.

And, actually, it does prevail,
here and now.

After many years
in the trenches of warfare
I can tell you with no equivocation
or hesitation,whatsoever,

God is not mocked.

Everyone thinks
they are getting away
with whatever it is
that they have hidden
in their little "secret world".

I have really bad news.

There are no secrets.

Just minimal
and temporary
posing as
ultimate truth.

These will all soon enough be wiped away,
by their own inability to comport with reality.


But, wait just a minute.

Define your terms.

What in the world could possibly be "reality"?,
when everyone's ideas
are all run through
numerous mind-bending filters of perception,
so that everyone has their own
(and probably very unique)
idea of just what "reality" is.

but you are thinking
that you can even know what "reality" is,
in the first instance.

Here you are completely and entirely wrong.

No human knows any more about what "reality" is,
than an amoeba cast off a cruise ship
in the middle of the Pacific Ocean
knows about
what exactly is going on
at the center of the Earth.

I was reading all of the great modern philosophers
by the time I was twelve years old.

I had read all of their great works
by the time I was sixteen or seventeen years old.

After having studied the "existentialists"
and the "lost generation"
and their various ideas and concepts
I gave up on quests for "reality",
realizing that it is so perceptual and subjective
as to be,
in the final analysis,

That is,
a meaningless word.

Assuming precision to be required for effective communication to take place. 

But it is this very ambivalence which people love,
because they can hide
their latest dark doings
behind obfuscation.

If words can be made to mean anything I like,
then I can say the opposite of what I mean,
while sounding like
I really do mean what I am saying.

Just take a listen around you
in any modern city
or airport.

It's not really that hard
to see that almost everyone is lying,
almost constantly.

You just have to look and listen.

As an aside,
this is the first thing
which simply has to go
if any relationship
is ever to last
over time.

Lies, lies, lies.

The very enemy of "truth"
and "reality",
whatever that is,
or turns out to be.

So, you are repeatedly given a choice in life.

The Truth.

or The Lie.

They are the first steps
on numerous branches
leading off into numerous directions.

One leading to goodness,
the other to evil.

both looking the same
during the first several steps.

Go figure ---

At any rate,
that seems like enough fun
for the moment.

you know the drill.

I really do have to go now.

Much work to do
and very little time
to get it done.

Forty eight hours (or thereabouts) to go?

Until what?,
you should be asking yourself,
if you have even an ounce of inquisitiveness
within yourself.

Until the end of my 59th.

And what a strange and eventful 59th it has been.

I met one of the most interesting (to me) persons I have ever met,
at the start of the year.

And then saw my life abruptly ended for a few minutes
on the date of my deceased "father-in-law's" birthday.

And then resuscitated
by his daughter,
whom I taught many of the skills
which were being used on me by her
to keep me alive (in this world).

Have we come full circle,
do you suppose?

And from there onward, and upward,
to Sparta,
and Olympia,
and finally,
to Delphi,
and Thermopylae.

Well, I am told,
on very good authority,
that a band of gypsies is scheduled to arrive at 2 p.m.
and that I will be kidnapped
and carried off to an undisclosed location
for several days.

Knowing these guys
(or should I say, girls?)
I know that I cannot be anything
but in big, big trouble.

They scare me.

Last time
they took me to an indoor shooting range,
where I was able to "take out"
Osama Bin Laden
(even before the Marines supposedly did),
and Sadam Hussein
(after the Marines did).

they were both aiming rifles at me,
what was I supposed to do, anyway?

Everyone loved how the blindest one in the group
had by far the deadliest aim.

Practice.  Practice.  Practice.

As I like to say.

I won't go into the specifics here and now.

The three words speak for themselves, I think.

So, the point of this
is that I will probably not get
a whole lot of production accomplished
during the next several days.

I will also probably not be on
or near
a computer,
(other than the half dozen
I carry with me everywhere I go
 - but, offline, I hope).

So, no posts.

about my chances of survival on any given day.

It is even moreso right now
as I approach this strange
"milestone of madness".

I left this world long ago,
in spirit.

So the whole age thing
just doesn't have that much relevance to me.

to the world around me
it is almost all they think about.

I am already dead and buried,
long ago.

No more problems with age.

Well, on that morbid and dark note,
I will say goodbye,

and may God bless you most abundantly
with all of the things which really DO matter.

w/love and much affections,


8:35 a.m.
Ventura, California, USA